I THINK I CAN....I THINK I CAN... IT WILL BE OK. Day's 4-7.

I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN*

*Only if you've been tied down by giants and told that a small kitten will be injured every time you smoke. 

I made it to day 4. It's been a terrible.....terrible few days, and physically.  I'm pretty sure I've eating all the non-perishables in my pantry along with anything snacks I had hiding in my purse.  NOT GOOD YA'LL, I'm starting to substitute food for smoking. NO NO NO NO.  But i'm soooooo hungry, I think.  

It's been pretty difficult to determine if I'm hungry or thirsty. Tired or awake. Sad or happy.  My mind and body have no clue what is going on and is taking the low road, to say the least. 

What I've been doing to remedy this:  This isn't "Healthy" or "PC", but I've been sleeping. To me, if I'm not awake to deal with the craving, maybe I'll wake up without one. Maybe.  Also, anytime a hunger pang is hitting me hard, I chug a huge glass of water, wait about 20 min, and if the hunger's still there, I'm genuinely hungry, then a raid the fridge for goodies.

So far, there's been no major fights with the family or S.O.  But, we've still got a few years to get through. :)

I've also made it a point to immediately do something when I wake up in the morning.  Read, paint, cook, clean the house or myself. For me, this time of day is the hardest.  I wake up, and within about 30 min i'm craving. NUTS!  This has helped distract me from the craving and got my creative or cleanliness juices flowing. 

DAY 5

Why did I ever start smoking?? 

This was the first question that popped in my head this morning. WHY? In sweet baby Jesus' name, why did I take up this filthy habit?  Everything around me is beginning to REEK of smoke and ash and cigarettes. I thought, EW.  For the first time ever...EW came to mind.  I smelled like that allllll the time. I never noticed.. Poor co-workers. Poor S.O. Poor toothbrush.. They deserve someone who doesn't smell like a fireplace full of tar. This is getting SO MUCH EASIER! It seems like the "need" is going away and being replaced with "want".  I want to be healthier and live longer.  I want to be able to walk up the stairs or get out of bed without being winded. I WANT to quit smoking.  And I did! I considered this feeling ( and the decrease of pangs) as being a non smoker.  I DON'T smoke.  No smoker ever, wakes up after smoking for 10 years and quits, then starts again.  Well, maybe not NO smoker ever. But, I'm having strong feelings that it won't be me.  Not again,,,,NOT EVER AGAIN.
Day 7

I've had 1 craving today, it's 10 pm. I think I did it. I KNOW I did it!!!!!

Finally,,, the craving came to me and I shook it off like it was a baby fart in a movie theater.  Nothing, nada, nope.  It came and went in about a minute. Done and Done.  After 10 yrs of proactively killing myself, I can breath. I don't feel trapped anymore. I feel more self confident and assured.  I'm proud of myself and have a wee bit more respect for myself.  If I can break addiction with an e-cig I bought at Walmart for $20, of which I haven't used since day 4, and a little time off from stress, what else can I do!? Or you!? What else could you do? ASK yourself this.  Make a list. These are all the things I would rather be doing that smoking a cigarette, you'd be surprised  how basic those actions will be.  I'm a non-smoker now after 10 years. You can do it too. I PROMISE, just start.  It's okay to fail and falter, it's just practice in the beginning.  :) Eventually reason with expectation meets, and it's easy.  You WON'T want to smoke anymore.  Your WANT will outweigh your NEED. Start now, and get ready to say "No, I don't smoke anymore"  OR "No thank you, I quit." It can my WAY sooner than  you think.  

Any questions or concerns you may have or just need someone to talk to.  Feel free to comment here or email me @ OLLIEDOO88@GMAIL.COM